Where Society Stops Looking: The Cost of Being Overlooked.

By: Augusta Osmatu Bangura

“I’m fed up with this,” says Kadie Conteh, a widow at the Congo Town community whose life has been shaped by grief, hardship, and a relentless struggle to survive. In a fast-moving world where minds are programmed to not notice the pain of others, women like Kadie live in a society that doesn’t solve problems—it outruns them. But for those who are unable to run, every day feels like an endless stretch of sorrow, an extension of yesterday’s suffering.

Kadie lost her husband three years ago to a disease that not only took his life but drained the family's resources so much that, in their grief, they silently prayed for it all to end. She is unemployed, and her adult children face the same grim reality. Their only means of survival is street begging—a reality far off from dignity, hope, and the ability to dream again.

Widowhood in Sierra Leone is not just grief — it's a lifelong sentence of being overlooked

Kadie is not alone in her pain. In the same Congo Town community, lives another widow, Yeanoh Conteh, whose story is even more heartbreaking. She has not only lost her husband, but has also buried five of her children and now clings to the lives of her two surviving daughters, one of whom is gravely ill. “My friends are the only reason I haven’t lost my mind,” she says, tears streaming down her face.

Both women speak with the quiet heaviness of enduring grief, where survival replaces living and hope fades into mere endurance. In this cold reality, the Village Savings and Loan Associaion (VSLA) stands as a small but meaningful flicker of hope.

Forgetting their troubles for a moment: Widows at Dwazark compete in "tug of peace" during a JNJF engagement drive.

Established by the Jamil & Nyanga Jaward Foundation, this community-based savings pool offers a rare chance for financial independence. It's not much, but in places like Congo Town, it's everything.

The real tragedy, however, goes beyond the widows themselves. It reaches their children—young victims of loss who are forced into survival mode long before they understand what childhood should feel like; the child in them gets beaten by the hurdles of life. In homes where a father figure is absent and the future feels uncertain, dreaming becomes a luxury. Hunger, despair, and lack of opportunity force many down dangerous paths where their innocence is stolen and dreams are replaced by desperation. Girls, desperate to provide for their families, often enter transactional relationships (hookups, sugar daddies). Boys, seeking for escape from a reality they never chose, turn to drugs like Kush. These are not choices; they are consequences.

This is what happens when widows are ignored—the next generation becomes collateral damage.

This is what happens when society overlooks its most vulnerable. The pain is passed on from one generation to the next, fueling a cycle of poverty, addiction, prostitution and despair—unless something changes. It’s no surprise that Sierra Leone ranks as the second unhappiest country in the world, with a happiness score of just 3.0, according to the 2024 World Happiness Report.

So, what happens to the countless other widows across Sierra Leone who have no one and nothing to hold on to like the VSLA? What becomes of the children who grow up watching their mothers break under the weight of hopelessness? The Jamil & Nyanga Jaward Foundation offers a glimpse of what could be.

Empowerment doesn't need to be big to be powerful — it starts right here. VSLA— yearly savings pool where they contribute and share funds to empower each other.

Through their support of VSLA and empowerment initiatives, they provide more than money—they offer dignity, self-worth, and a lifeline to women who have been left behind. But more must be done.

These women are not just stories in paragraphs. They are our mothers, our neighbors, our sisters, our aunts. They wake up each day to a reality many of us couldn’t endure for a day—yet they survive. And while their strength is inspiring, they deserve more than just survival because survival isn’t living.

So, how should we respond? Do we keep walking past them, pretending not to see? Or do we choose to care—genuinely, and be part of the support they so desperately need? Helping doesn’t require grand gestures. Supporting the VSLA, funding a skill-training program, donating to a widow-led initiative—to you, it might seem small. But to them, it's everything. It's a chance to live, not just exist. Let us not be the society that stops looking. Let us be the reason someone finds hope again.